Big Love

[angel of darknezz]

Who else likes this show?

[killshot]

As a Mormon polygamist myself, I find the show to be highly offensive. I certainly wouldn't want any of my 14 children watching this garbage and getting the wrong idea about what Mormonism is about. Let me fill you in on a few facts about Mormons.

It is perfectly acceptable to marry as many times as you like, however divorce is strictly forbidden. Over the years, this has led to a series of men marrying the wives of other men and connecting families through what we call a "marriage chain." Sometimes marriage chains swallow up other chains creating a larger, "marriage web." Currently, a web consisting of 75% of the population of Utah is spiraling out of control and threatens to ensnare the entirety of the mid-west. Children of this web are advised to remain celibate due to the overwhelming odds of marrying their own siblings.

Despite popular belief, orgies are not permitted in polygamist relationships. Each wife gets her own time to be alone with her husband which is determined by work schedule, social obligations, phases of the moon, and menstrual cycle.

All underwear is magic underwear. Anything as complex and intricate as undergarments must have been created by God, and therefore sacred.

Because of the large family size of most Mormon households, children are given goofy names in order to help their parents tell them apart. This has led to some rather interesting names such as Davf, Asshole (Ash-Oh-La), and Mitt.

The bland and unappealing clothing worn by Mormon women serves to make them look as unattractive as possible so as to ward off men in search of more wives. Skirts are a necessity as pants will obstruct child birth.

I hope that clears up a few things. Now if you will excuse me, the kids are off at church camp and I'm going to try to convince wife #2 that homosexuality is only a sin when two men are involved.

[angel of darknezz]

Umm... Have you ever actually watched this show?

[killshot]

Originally Posted by angel of darknezz

Umm... Have you ever actually watched this show?

Once. The episode I saw was about the blond wife accidentally hitting a neighborhood kid with the car. She got the other wives to help bury the kid's body and their dark secret helped them grow closer as a family. At least I think that was what happened.

[angel of darknezz]

Yeah, I figured as much. You obviously have no idea what this show is truly about.